I'm going to talk about some pretty NSFW things I found on the Internet (necrophilia and guro). No detailed descriptions of what I saw here.

The other week I read a comic about a necrophilia. The name of the comic is "Sexy Losers" and the necrophilia storyline is called "[name of the guy] and the suicide girl" I forgot the name of the guy. The website sexylosers.com has more weird/gross sex related storylines which I didn't read because it's all just other adult stuff and nothing interesting (like necrophilia) (I mean I didn't bother checking the other storylines because I went nap time instead so I can't tell you if they are actually boring. There's this storyline where the girl really wants her boyfriend to eat her poop and poop is gross so I went to sleep instead)

It was... odd and had explicit scenes but I read the whole thing. ...Twice (Why!! why??? you ask!) because 1) I liked the art style, it's weeby, and 2) I was curious... Why did the artist write such comic? Could the artist be a necrophile too? Maybe, I thought, so I kept reading because I wanted to try and see what goes on in such a person's mind. Not that I formulated any conclusions about the author from it, I'm not an expert on that (yet?), and it was past my bedtime so I can't really think. I feel like the comic was just a regular silly adult comedy comic but ... darker? grosser? I don't know the perfect word, like, it's a funny slice of life comic but instead of regular love life troubles, it's the love life troubles of a necrophile. eh... I wouldn't read it again, especially when I'm sane.

(Last entry was about incest, now necrophilia? dear god....)

I think, yesterday or the day before yesterday, I was on Tumblr, searching #animecore #weirdcore stuff. And, I usually don't do this, but I was in a sort of edgy mood.. so I was scrolling through those tags in hopes of coming across anime gore. I've seen it before, on those tags.. I don't really like it when "weird" is associated with dark topics but there I was, looking for it. I'm curious, but I just don't have enough courage to just straight up search for gore.

I *did* find 2 posts, one kinda mellow and the other one more explicit. The second post was tagged with "guro", which I know of. Guro means grotesque erotica or basically gore porn. (It sounds terrible right? Don't search it...) I'm glad there wasn't actually any sexual going on on in that post, just a girl on the floor with her limbs chopped off. Then I decided to take a break after that.

I wondered, do people actually get off from gore? I mean, there's definitely an audience, I'm sure. Those people must be sick... I found two threads asking the same question.

What I learned from these threads is that: most* people consume guro don't do it to pleasure themselves erotically, they just like looking at guts because of morbid curiosity, and that one doesn't have to be sick in the head to enjoy gore.

*I don't know how accurate is what I just said, and I'm just basing it off a comment I saw and a few couple others. I don't like *actually* looking for gore so I have no idea what's the community like really like.

Other stuff I have to say: Anime and weird crap... I like the combination of those two aesthetics... I think it's mega cool. If you like that too then maybe you should check out Ranfren neocities. I really like the spiky, hella detailed hair and the big, kawaii~ eyes, cuz like, in a way they remind me of dolls.

Music~ <3 It's Chopin

like, totally!

heyyy I'm writing this right now cuz I've been thinking a lot of stuff and like, I have this weird feeling in my tummy!!! Not like they're connected aha~

Also I say "like" a lot! Maybe I say it too much? I dunno haha I hope it's not that annoying but if it is then whutevur~~~

So like, what is that you want to tell us, Heart? (you say this)

It's so weird! Why do I always like the plainest looking guys? My little Shuichi Saihara obsession is coming back :( I hate him kinda and I've always told everyone that I hated him! I hate him but/and I think about him a lot... I gave him some of the worst and grossest(?) headcanons cuz I dislike him. Some Shuichi headcanons I have are: he doesn't use deodorant, he showers only once a week, he is an incel, he likes and does animegao cosplay (this one is actually a pretty cool headcanon)

Then like, the other day I reread some chapters of Spy X Family (which is a really fun manga that you should totally read, by the way!) and I might have developed a fondness for Yuri Briar. Yes, Yuri Briar, the sister con! Like, what the heck! He looks like Shuichi haha. I mean straight black hair, looks emo, and has a job that does police things. I mean... he's cute(?)? Eh???? This siscon? I sound insane... I mean, it's not like I like him *because* he's a siscon! I think he's funny... I also think... men in uniforms are .... hot..... (EH??????????? no way I wrote that...) So... sick....

(If this is making you turn away from picking up Spy X Family, please know that he's just a side character and he appears like hella rarely! please don't let the fact that a side character is a sis con ruin the manga for you.. SxF is a really good manga just make sure to ignore the incestuous comic relief character! Gahahahahahaa!)

I forgot what else was I thinking about... so ... I'm going to talk about games now. So like, yesterday I think, I finally reached Legend rank in MLBB! Woohoo! I ranked up pretty fast compared to last season, so like, that probably means I'm on my way to be a pro gamer, right!!! Maybe, maybe... I'm most experienced with offlaner and mage role. I used to me a support and tank main too but I quit that. And I play marksman when I feel like it in unranked games. So like, the jungler role is the one I'm most noob with. Also I don't have much hero variety. My main heroes for each role is: mage - Kagura, fighter/offlane - Ruby, Guinevere, and if the mage and fighter roles are taken, I can play tank with Atlas. Gee... I still have a lot to learn! But I'm glad that I'm genuinely having fun playing MLBB nowadays. Unlike before... Playing is so much more fun if you don't care about win rates! I know people who quit the game cuz they were sick of losing winrate. Skill issue! Or... maybe I'm just really good compared to them? Maybe I'm lucky too? Whatevaa

Also for Season 22, I'm totally gonna be a Ruby main! Forget Kagura! But... I still play her because I don't trust myself with other mages. And like she's really fun to play

So about website things, here are stuff I plan to do:

  • Revamp: DR shrine, K1-B0 shrine
  • Think about: Pony Town shrine, my ocs, my sonas
  • Finish the: DR1 shrine!!! I guess you can tell how I feel about DR1 by now since I procrastinate it a lot...
  • Make in da future!!!: Phoenix wright shrine!!!

  • Ending music~~